The Truth about Living-Together and its Future

Kishore Vishwa
5 min readJan 3, 2021

Cohabit is the best method to practice until…

Image by congerdesign from Pixabay

As information and opportunities pour into the world, numerous new rules and lifestyles have been invented and conceived by people all over the world based on their convenience.

Furthermore, all new practices in circulation are accepted based only on short-term benefits. The reality is that not everyone is mature about its future consequences. One such untaught — unaware — practice is Living-Together.

No official research has yet proven the right and wrong associated with it. However, from known psychological studies of the individual’s mood-swings, we can predict the future and analyze its potential.

Living-Together

Cohabit is used to analyze one’s ability to lead a healthier lifestyle and to check their reliability, apart from being a tactic to share a bed. But only mature adults (> 27) are practicing it in the right way.

Most teens and young adults (<25) are considering it as an option to:

1. Free bed sharing

2. Cut cost-of-living (through shared expenses)

3. Show-off (that they are having a partner, & they’re living with them)

Beyond these contradictions, it may be prevailing in the Western world for people to embrace it in large numbers, but, in the East, even countries that embrace religion and culture have begun to accept it in defiance of their attachment to marriage.

Adaptation and inheritance alone cannot be the cause of such a development. Then why this sudden growth? How is support growing? Could this become common to the world? — To answer these questions, we need to cite some foundation of human psychology.

The psychology of humans

Mostly, humans are:

1. Free-spirited

2. Achievement-oriented

3. Hardihood demeanors

Free-spirited — Since evolution, humans have always had the intention to run independently. We never liked the idea of ​​being submissive. If so (unknowingly), it would have lasted until we found it. We will not allow anything beyond a certain point to oppress us. We have a threshold for everything.

Achievement-oriented — We (especially men) are always on a hunt for something. As women reproduce, the thirst for innovation/discovery is the only source to sustain a meaningful life for men. Now, the competition is as wide as the opportunities; all are looking for a chance to excel. While pursuing something, anything we carry along will be considered a distraction.

One of the most successful tactics is “Hardihood” — if we were handed our desires and then subjected to threat in it, most of us will be ready to face them because we get what we have desired in the first place.

Considering all this, if you look for what cohabit offers, you can understand that it offers what a younger human mind seeks. Here, hardihood is associated with psychological, social, and sexual stability that a young one will look for in their early puberty.

Without the live-in formula, previously mentioned maybe just a dream for many. But with live-in, while meeting the needs of nature, it has become a dream-come-true environment for all souls who consider achievement and freedom above anything else.

Cohabit helps everyone to be in their realm. Everything will be fine until the couple in Live-in decides to have a baby or to carry it for a lifetime; because that’s where the problem starts.

Marriage Organization

To understand the structure of marriage and to identify its positives over live-in, we need to look at two founding forms of human beings:

1. Psychological

2. Physical

The Psychological Need for a Marriage knot — Humans take about “7 years” to make a lifelong bond with another. But it is not easy for anyone, as hormones continue to change their effects every minute. Anyone with a mentality before a few minutes could alter to a completely different one after a few minutes.

It will be difficult for anyone to cope with another one who shows similar complexities for seven years. Quarrels may come, irritability might cause, fatigue could occur, and confusion may ensue.

That is why marriages demand patronage of a few individuals; they will educate common problems and solutions. The couple gets legal alone-time to think before splitting up and re-bond in the relationship to get a clearer picture too. Therefore, from fatal damages, the relationship and the future will be saved.

The Physical classification gets categorized into “3” sub-parts

  • Adolescence
  • Adulthood
  • Old age

Adolescence is a journey of “thirst and questions,” where the new mind is introduced to the existing system and questioned from a naked perspective. This stage is a complete journey of grasping combined with extensive energy spent on the learning and growing.

Unfortunately, this phase requires 24/7 monitoring to protect from surrounding threats and to get educated.

Adulthood is a traverse of finding clarity in grasped concepts. They get rewarded as they bring light to comprehended concepts and sets an easy path for others to travel. That reward stabilizes the economy of the house, as well as society.

Unlike the other two phases, adulthood is a bit more complicated due to its responsibility to:

  • make the economy better
  • run behind achievements
  • have a child & to take care of them, and
  • look after their parents

The one thing that would be lacking in this stage is “time”.

Old age — where leisure, generosity, and respect are valued more than anything else. There will be no power like the previous stages to do everything; This persistent physical instability may later turn into an inferiority complex.

Image by anand_d_notorious

Here, marriage (through the family system) forces one to be dependent on each other. Like a triangular structure, the set-backs of one grid are taken care of with the other two.

A child needs constant supervision and upbringing, and an older person needs value and recognition. The family structure will force the elderly to look after their grandchildren and give adults enough time to focus on economic development without worry about their children.

Grandparents will naturally provide a more loving and fertile environment for their grandchildren with the support of greater tolerance, acceptance, and maturity (acquired through experience). By doing so, they develop a sense of stability through responsibility.

Though marriage (& family structure) is prodigious for a better environment and stability in all phases of life, unlike Live-In, you will not only handle one (paradoxical) soul but many more. Therefore, taking care of a family structure requires a lot more responsibility than a Live-in relationship.

If you’re considering live-in for life long, with children — you won’t just break the relationship at one point but, you will make the environment hard for you and harder for your kid. If you’re planning without a child — you won’t just break up your relationship but yourself as well.

It is the primary reason for many “celebrities” (who are single) to get broke after some point in their life, though being rich and famous, as the necessity for someone starts to occur. You have to have the utmost determination to your partner to hold them in your life through a live-in relationship. Being said, cohabit is the best method if you’re in your early adulthood and not going for a kid.

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Kishore Vishwa

Focusing on social-issues and the psychology behind.