The Psychology of Teen Love

Kishore Vishwa
6 min readNov 21, 2019

In the 21st Century, it is easy to highlight a Teen in a crowd, especially while in pairs, heedless the place. Their attitude towards expressing love in the public is the main reason, and it keeps increasing from one generation to another.

This attitude doesn’t affect the millennials, but Gen X is not dealing well with it. To the teens, it’s just an expression and a right of/to their feelings but to those in grandparents age, it’s a cultural mess.

Times have changed. Life of everyone became social (media) from private. Whatever you do is a phenomenon of showcasing (showing-off) the surrounding people. Everything you do, demands recognition from others (as Likes and Comments, in recent times). Things like this provoke the private life to become public (as it can pull more eyes).

Is it that bad to make our Love life social?
Let’s get into the things happening in the society with teens and the reactions of Gen X for that.

Regardless of anything, looking for a partner will be primary to all the needs a human mind will wish in Teenage (basically, hormonal reactions). The hormonal rush will not show mercy or discrimination on anyone. If the attitude they (teens) are exposing returns from the other side, the situation becomes out of control in both genders.

Amid this phase, having a partner is seen as a huge achievement. So, instead of maintaining a private life they are bringing the celebrations social (media/places). Humans are attention seekers. In everyone’s mind, they are the protagonist. If they make something to turn the focus light fall on them, Dopamine secrets (unless suffering from an illness). Continued longings for that attention could put us in a mental disorder though! (dopamine rush).

The Contradicting Gen X

The generation gap from Gen X to Gen Z is laconic but, the interpretation of behaviors and manners dissimilitudes. Gen X gets offended quite often with Gen Z. But the Millennials didn’t seem to be upset to their level. Even, they are looking at it as a chance to express their emotions with this behavior.

The views of elders seem to be a bit aggressive about the teen’s behavior. They often feel like the Teens are hungry for SEX, irrespective of the place and keep on complaining about the couples who broke rather than those staying in their relationships. Thus, in-evidently bringing up the break-up story popular and molded stories to low light.

After all, these Teens have the habit of frequently changing their partners (immature selection howbeit) resulting in too many love stories before becoming an adult. This attitude may put them in many short-term relationships later in life as well. This doesn’t seem to be a good sign, however.

This concept is not new to society. Though the elders may disagree, all have done this in one of many ways in their time. They could recollect it yet, they try to contradict themselves. This is due to the fear of destabilization their descendants will have in the relationships.

Let’s take everything seen above into consideration and look at a Teen’s behavior, and Public’s opinion based on the Anatomical and Psychological changes. To understand the concept of Teen Love clearly.

Female’s Anatomy:

The female species are the only kind of living organisms at the beginning of life forms on earth. Its proofs are on the single cellular organisms which are still reproducing through binary fission.

This type of reproduction won’t provide diversity in the species thus, making it prone to infections of a similar kind. This will destroy the entire species in that region because the replicates are from a single mother. It divides by sharing the same DNA structure. If a virus mutates to collapse one replicate, it will apply the same formula to other replicates; as it shares the same type of immune system.

To save the species from destruction, single cellular organisms mutated to divide the chromosomes; producing a completely different type of DNA (Obviously, the Male replicates).

Male’s Anatomy:

A Male would start to look for a partner at the age of 11 on average (though they may not know what they would do if they have one). His anatomical changes in the body begin at 15. In nature, the species MALE was originated (after quite a time from Females, literally) to provide diversity in the species.

In that stage, a male’s primary work is to bring diversity through the mix of genomes to produce different varieties of DNA models in the offspring (to overcome the immune deficiency faced by the dissection of cells from a single mother). Later, the male starts acquiring strength to safeguard the females and babies from outside threats of the environment.

Modern conditions of those Anatomies

As per the anatomy, a female will develop the offspring and depend on a Male (for its protection). Females select well-built protective Males as their mate.

The only male role in nature is to reproduce and protect females. These are the anatomy of a body, and it’ll happen during the initial stages of puberty. So, naturally, a human being will look for a sexual partner when they are about to enter puberty (by the age of ~13).

Generation X’s Mindset

In general, things contradicting from regular, offends people, which might take control off of their hand. The same is happening with Gen X. The Grandparents of society have a fear of being contradicting them from the change in society.

The problems (fears) are:

  1. Their Descendants might choose a wrong partner that may affect the lifestyle of those in a relationship and may lose their path in the future.
  2. The Fear about the Control that Gen X must leave!

1st one may seem OK to everyone but, the 2nd will not get by everyone’s idea. Because the time is not moving in that direction these days.

Till the time of Gen X, only Senior people had held power (in most cases) based on experience (concerning the time they have spent on). This principle is being broke in recent times.

You may raise a doubt like, “why should everything must be in their control?”. To understand the statement clearly, we must roll back a few decades.

The Generation Gap

The beginning of the generation gap is the transformation of society.

In the late 1960s, children of that decade started to equalize, and overpower the parents and other elders by grabbing information which will be available only after years of perseverance through information technology.

The beginning of the computer era has brought down the requirement of time to acquire the needs, irrelevant, which messed up the previously maintained structure (The structure based on elders to lead the society). When someone earns much or leads the pack, whatever coming out of their mouth is not just words but wisdom and order.

The same principle has been applied to the younger generation and handing over society to them. So, controlling emotions in this stage by themselves is impossible in most cases.

The Root of Expressing Love in the Public

Assume that your country is maintaining a discipline of not showing love in the public like hugging and kissing. Maintaining this discipline at an airport is unnecessary. Have you ever wondered why?

Because of the people who have achieved something, or earned something holds Power, and whatever they do (even if it’s out of their control) will be leveraged.

Seeing such an attitude at an airport is an example. This attitude is being carried out by those who have accomplished in their life (regardless of the place). Human beings being the opportunists in nature, will wait for something to get started. If something gets initiated, people will blindly follow, irrespective of the cause and effects.

This is the root of expressing love in the public, which has spread across the country and culture.

The Aftermaths of Love in Public

Behaving in this way may seem like a common thing in Nature. But what will be the effects (and outcomes) of this culture?

Take a simple anatomical act as an example. Naturally, not captured things attracts people. If they catch someone had having their wishlist in hand, the instinct of jealousy rises out of nowhere, and it’s a common phenomenon with everyone

What if this situation is being faced by someone who is suffering from their partner’s loss? Or with someone who doesn’t have a chance to be with one?

A person with a strong will-power will move forward by thinking about it for a short time. But a person with less will power may face severe depression and other mental illnesses even for this kind of small acts.

We may think that we are just sharing our love with concern but, if a mentally weak person goes through the jealousy, it may bring a monster out of him, resulting in horrible incidents in the society.

If you ask me whether it is a good idea to express love in the public, my thoughts are like, “it’s not an offense to express love in public but, it’s not moral to do so”.