How to avoid Over parenting, and bring-up the best child for future

Kishore Vishwa
5 min readJun 15, 2020
Image by Pexels from Pixabay

Modern lifestyle

The world is open to all. Things that have been classified to set of people like community-based sharing & discussion, area-based education, cultivation-based food habits were lost in life are living examples.

Social play is the new trend irrespective of location, race, culture, or anything that mattered earlier. Thanks to the world of the internet.

This is the reason for most people to catch-up on several things and leaving culture, ethnicity, and tradition behind on the whole. Everyone’s focus is on individual developments more than societal structures. Hence, many structures and conditions were going astray.

Everyone’s life has been their priority, putting development and growth as foremost to all; the internet just showcased those publicly. So, everyone’s life has seen a change both positively and negatively.

In the phase of negativity, even though there is n number of things, the most affected one was- parenting. Because that’s the only thing being the reason for upcoming generations’ shape on this planet.

Parents’ mentality in child growth

The concept of individual development is rooted in everyone through one basic instinct- Survival of the fittest. To be fit, one has to learn and drop various things based on demand. But the problem is- everyone now has the recipe to be fit (get wealthier).

When everyone was alike, no one settles to be the way they are. They try to show their differences through various aspects, and one such common aspect is- trying to be better than others.

People keep pushing their limits to be in the zone; unfortunately, this attitude would become part of one’s life in the long run and will have a huge impact when it comes to parenting.

The basic parenting mentality differs in 2 distinctive types:

1. A dad’s (male’s) mentality

2. A mom’s (female’s) mentality

A Dad’s (male’s) mentality is directed towards giving his child the fullest. The best he can give. This mentality is based on a male’s psychological nature of showing himself as the savior and describing/projecting himself through what he’s doing/making for a living.

A Mom’s (female’s) mentality is directed towards bringing her child No:1, in all possible ways. This mentality is based on a female’s psychological nature of bringing herself to the No:1 position in everyone’s priority list through love and care.

Parents’ mindset on providing

A Man tries to ensure that his kid didn’t suffer from anything. He’s a warrior in his mind and will do anything to protect his belongings. He would do anything to retain the image of the warrior/protector. So, if his kid asks for something, instead of knowing its purpose of demand, he’d look for ways to bring that thing to his kid.

If he fails to do so, then he thinks about himself as a failure model from protecting his child from mental suffering.

A Woman tries to ensure whether her child is being the best among every other child out there. Because that’s the position a mother wants to be in her child’s mind. She’d do anything to be in that position, and to retain it every time.

As her wishes and thoughts are based on other kids, she fancies what is fancied in the society, and would get her child those things.

All these come under the term- over parenting; when the kid is served with what’s more than enough to carry on a balanced life.

The impacts of over parenting

The fighting nature in the kid will be deprived to a greater extent if the dad continues to satisfy his kid’s demands. Also, resistivity towards anything will get weaker over some time.

From a Mom’s care, the child would become the jack of all trades and master of none. The interest in the kid would be widely dispersed, so, bringing up a single talent to shine would be a huge task in the kid’s elder life.

The misshapen child’s future

A Dad’s over protectiveness would bring a maniac in his child’s later life or would make them weak to face anything they like.

A Mom’s over protectiveness would bring very low self-esteem/confidence when the kid tries to shine through a single method.

The combined result- the kid will not be ready to suffer even for a bit in the future. Also, they wouldn’t know what comes best from their interest unless to look at others and fancy their growth.

The best parenting method (psychologically)

All the training of over parenting will block a child’s ability even if the child is formed from unlinked DNA prototypes.

To bring up a child mentally strong, the child should be taught both mentalities of its dad and mom (male’s and female’s). It should be fed with both of its parents’ experiences and qualities from their core.

From a dad- the kid should be given the thirst to endure his/her life without fulfilled sophistication from its dad. The kid should be given what it is asking for, only after ensuring that it’s out of his/her interest instead from a hungry eye.

From a mom- the kid should be taught to love and to see from a motherhood’s perspective in everything the kid undergoes. When it comes to providing, the kid should be fed what it wants from its core, that’s been carved long. That should be supported by a mother and should help the kid to excel in that.

The creation of Alpha kids

With all the experiences from its parents’, the child would be educated with common sense, and the strength to endure anything the kid likes to endure. It will have the courage to face the world with so much love to give.

In nature, not every child born are becoming alphas. Only a few. Most of it is through proper education and experiences. If the child was taught with all the basic qualities of human beings with all the experiences his/her parents have gone through, the child would not just be loaded with mental strength but will be an alpha in every aspect.



Kishore Vishwa

Focusing on social-issues and the psychology behind.